Tuesday, May 31, 2005

(at slipper club)
Hey dudes- SOOOOO... do you want to play the July 30th show with Kris Racer and Ben Gates (that guy I know who wears the small shirts and lives with Craigs dopplegainger). It is a saturday night. email me at jennifershulkin@hotmail.com

come on i dare ya

Sunday, May 29, 2005

speaking of excretion, someone just let out tons of info on our shows page.

I just checked our web stats, and we received 7 hits from people searching for "Death of a Sailsman". (That last sentence has nothing to do with excretion.)
Peed on the floor!? That kid must've been SUPER drunk! I bet he was having a good time! Ah, to be young again.

Saturday, May 28, 2005

a kid peed on our floor today at work. this is the second time this has happened. discuss.
hoo0hhooohooray. i just bought 6 movies because blockbuster is selling all their vhs tapes. little do they know how much this shit'll be worth someday. matt, is that a promise, because if i don't get a song at every single drink i want my money back or maybe just donated to a charity of my choice.

what came first, swords or fucking swordfishes?

Friday, May 27, 2005

the swordfish has its two week birthday tommarrow. lut us all celebrate cerebrally. mash stomp.
no cake please, it gives gas
mezilla: Are you and Steven gonna vacation in tropical Chicago? Here's my offer: Craig and I will sing "Holiday Road" every time you take a drink. SPOILER: we only know the chorus. or is it the refrain?
janel doesn't have birthdays. you guys are so wierd. steven and i want to take a "vacation" and come visit. we go to the highest bidder. oh and sorry sam for not returning any of your phone calls, if it is any consolation, we saved them and listen to them often.......in a creepy way.

Tuesday, May 24, 2005

appreciate the grandiose treasure, 12 years in the making, Revenge of the Fist. I know we slacked last week, so in return we give you double the length, double the breadth, and triple the emotion!!!!
Janel -- Happy belated Birthday, dude.

I have a question for you: I have a sewing machine that I don't know how to use, cos it's been years since I've touched one. Could you give me a refresher course? You came with a referral from Natron. I will pay for yr help in one of the following: A) Beer B) Easy men C) A copy of "Tron" on Beta.

Holler back: jennypfafflin ut gmail dut com

Monday, May 23, 2005

we saw this human being on the street tonight. We're awesome....cuz he's famous!!!!! Seriously, it's a scientific fact that when light rays bounce off of celebrities and find there way to your retinas, you become ASM, which is science for "awesome".
I would like to wish you a happy birthday....janoodle.

Sunday, May 22, 2005


Friday, May 20, 2005

Guidance, and also a guido dance
Ian.... I would like to be shoothed by yr lush shoundz. I thought you told me it was at the Catachromes but Aassron swear it at the Korbel Room. Where should I strut myself to on this fine evening? Guidance is requested.
the bracelets are playing with the the robot ate me tonight. wish us luck! btw, i just bought a two day pass for intonationmusicfest. so see you guys on july 16 & 17?
Don't worry Craig.
There's alwaysSonny McCraiggerson
i wanna see dolphins! I wanna see DOLPHINS! I WANNA SEE DOLPHINS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Wednesday, May 18, 2005

this wont let me post pictures.

Tuesday, May 17, 2005

you only think you beat my late night post time. the only thing you beat me at is prevalence of typos. I hope you're enjoying your sleep. I think I'm going to go for a jog. You know...for the ladies.
youd have to be here for me to do tha tmelissa, and you are obviousyl not. your back is like 200 miles away. duh. i beat craigs late post time althoguht lucidity has flown the coop, who wants to make me grllled chese so i don't burn myself??

Monday, May 16, 2005

hey sam, sorry i missed your whole "weekend in town" thing. i was horridly sick. in fact, i still am. if you guys wanna talk behind my back, you should do it now, because with my ear infection i probably can't hear you. probably.
"more like hand that rocks the LABIA!"

Sunday, May 15, 2005

so some slavic woman at Big Bowl was trying to find out what the texture was like for the wontons. She asked, "Are they like... unborn babies?" I laughed and laughed and laughed.

Thursday, May 12, 2005

ha! HA!!!!! ahhhhhh! ha!~ woooo woooops

Wednesday, May 11, 2005

HEY!!! the newly posted movie was made a couple months ago, but the network wouldn't allow it to air. After a series of blowjobs ascending in quality, they finally gave in, so enjoy. (Don't worry, dad. I'm not gay. I only gave blowjobs to the women, or those that looked like women.)

Also, we're in re-run season, so some old movies are showing again. Re-enjoy!!!!

Tuesday, May 10, 2005

I got very sick after circle of death, actually.

Sam... I think Kinville is in town on Saturday if I recall my discussion with him (pre circle of death). My last final is Saturday morning @7:45. I will be drunk at 11:00AM. And I am still waiting on my shrimp dishes.

Now off to study fixed bed reactor design at work. Also: get more in debt in case Melissa did bad on her exam.
steven just woke me up by peeing noisily into the wrong corner of our bathroom. i love my life.
Sam!!!!??? You had long hair??!!!! Oh yeah, I remember. You need to grow that out right now!!!!

Recording with Zaid tonight went quite well. In honor of Zaid's skills the new album shall be called, "Zaid in America". Ha ha, laugh at my pun. LAUGH AT IT!!!!!!!!
I din't realize my glorious locks were so distracting to you melissa. You must have the same problem as our vice president did when he forced me to cut them off. I mean, he probly has a wife somewhere and doesn't want to be thinking those thoughts about young men.

Raaar. Recording was very emotional, but in the end turned out very well. So far. Watch out, we growl now.

Also, rearden. I jsut got your message. Do you have finals this weekend? Will you be up for so much partyting on friday when the mad kinvillian is in town??? Because I will be. Too bad I can't have ponytails anymore. If you had gone to debtors prison I would be the first in line for your trailer. WEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

Monday, May 09, 2005

hey, remember when sam had long hair?
i still am not studying.............instead i am looking at pictures from my 21st birthday party and laughing at (i mean, ADMIRING) sam's beautiful hair.
i feel like i can't keep up with you supra-bloggers. i am attempting at this moment to find out where the fuck my 7:45am exam is tomorrow, while also trying to figure out why the fuck it is at 7:45am. once i figure that out, i have no more reasonable excuses to postpone my actual studying for said exam.

matt, laura, steven and i have been party to several games lately that i have not been party to in a while. #1: spin-the-bottle, after which everyone got sick. #2: circle of death, after which nobody got sick. or at least not anyone i know of.

whenever i feel sorry for myself, i just think, "hey matt's way more in debt than i am." and then i feel better about my life. thanks matt.

Sunday, May 08, 2005

(i) Rice. But on the side. Seperate plate. I HATE mixing on my plate.

(ii) It is too late. I found myself at home with a bootleg copy of K-pop stars covering the Judgement Night soundtrack. Reed 'n Cale got nothings on this.

(iii) I want to go read on my porch but I fear it might scare birds away from our feeder. And then I can never try to catch them in my jaws. So instead of reading I will probably have to go rent f*cking Get A Life.

Friday, May 06, 2005

All right. I'll punch your food order into the computer for table 2001998. A foodrunner will have it to you in 15 to 20 minutes. Extra time because we're out of shrimp. We have to run into the back and get some. Also, did you want rice or noodles with your Kung Pao?

I say Velvet Underground. "there's no school like the old school" --old guy, The Incredibles

Phew, that was a long cigarette.
Happy Friday blog. Happy way-belated birfday, Rambo.

I am not going to debtors prison for stiffing the hospital. It is the last day of classes (I skipped due to rain). Last night our little reverb'd-n- delay'd whirligig unit had a fun time gently throbbing shitty speakers at the Glass Nickel (to Melissa: sorry we shoulda brought a pillow for yr sleepy ass). It is raining, meaning when I am done with work my only true option is to drink Optimator on my couch whilst listening to tunes. And, in celebration of all this goodness, I am lifting my self-imposed no-music-buying ban for ONE (1) album of sweetness. I hope to buy an *ahem* "essential" *cough* that I am embarrassed not to have owned ("to have not owned"? "to not have owned"?) up 'til this point and need you to help me decide between:

(1) Black Flag - Damaged
(2) Velvet Underground - White Light/White Heat
(3) Funkadelic - Maggot Brain
(4) I dunno. Suggest something.

So yeah. Help wanted, biatches. Also: Big Bowlers I am desperate. I need you to send me a care package containing

a) Shrimp Pad Thai add Spicy extra Fresnos Fresnos Fresnos
b) Kung Pow Shrimp add Beef
c) Fiery Sichuan Shrimp
d) One ginger soda (2 limes)

Thanx. You all have the duration of exactly one Camel Light to respond. Don't let me down.

Wednesday, May 04, 2005

nice new movie. I thought that I was just having a bad connection the other night when called all y'all. now i get it.

Sam- yr old. haha.

I am at my roomates classroom now! My chair is small. I wish I could see Ian in it.

Tuesday, May 03, 2005


Monday, May 02, 2005

I always enjoy your long blogs, que hecho. Don't get your own blog. Make yourself at home here.

When asked to buy a DPC CD, the man said, "I'm about one pubic hair's length away from eating dog food right now." That statement filled me with glee.
The glorious things that you are super glad happen to you approx. 1 week prior to finals!

1) You thought you did good on that damn midterm, but noooooo... you must take comfort in knowing you *did* land just above the lower bound of the standard deviation. That's totally passing, right? And who really gives a damn about cylindrical catalyst pellets? Does anyone actually use them?

2) You remember that, although you do not ever go to the gym (unlike Sam "Ironman" Grant), you do still have a monthly fee from when you signed up thinking you would go. This upcoming fee, compounded with a health insurance payment and the chunk of overdue tuition you recently paid, means, you are just short on having enough for rent in spite of earning more money than you ever have before. Was it really worth it to get all those limited edition cd-rs and records a month ago? You leave a pity-seeking message on your landlord's answering machine and consider offering him a load of Skaters and Fushitsusha albums in lieu of cashola.

3) You recieve in the mail a) notice that you have forgotten to pay yr cell phone bill for 2 months and had best do so pronto b) notice that you still, for some reason, owe hospital bills from that time you got hit by the Hummer 2 years ago and HEY! they are gonna serve you with a lawsuit in 7 days unless you straighten some shite out. You look up buslines to Canada.

I need my own blog. Sorry, doodsz. STRESSTASTIC.

Sunday, May 01, 2005

Hey, we got a show TONIGHT! At SILVIE'S LOUNGE. with COLONY OF WATTS, MT. ST. HELENS, and DAS KAPITAL! Doors at *:#) P>M> (that's "8:30 P.M." with caps lock).

Also, there should be a new movie up by the end of today. If not, definitely tomorrow.